Netflix is totally trying to win me back.

Don't you find it strange that the same week I cancel my Netflix DVD subscription (which is now Qwikster or something), this just happens to arrive in the mail?

But wait. Here's the crazy part. This DVD? Totally not mine. No, seriously. It's not.

Uh-huh. I see right through your ploy, Netflix. You're trying to lure me back in with your little "mistakes." I'm not sure what I'm talking about. But rest assured...I've got my eye on you.

Subject: Construction Paper

Allison,


Do you have any construction paper? Can I have a piece?


Thanks,
X

This was a work email I received today. Please keep in mind that (although it might seem like it most of the time), I do not work at a preschool.

Mr. X might have let the cat out of the bag here. Clearly other departments are having Krazy Kraft Korner time with glitter and pipe cleaners and safety scissors. They probably even have nap time!

Meanwhile, the marketing folks are out saving people's lives. Who do you call when you're stuck in the elevator? Marketing. Who do you count on to pull the fire alarm when the building goes up in flames? Marketing. Who's going to scream, "run" at the top of her lungs and then take off full speed in the wrong direction during an earthquake? That one was all me.

Southern Fried Kidlets

I spent Labor Day weekend in

with my sister Anna and her family.

There are the twins, Madeline and Eli (4), and a new addition, Ward, who is two months old. If you're an aunt, you probably already know that you have to come bearing gifts. This consisted of circus peanuts, trucks for Eli, a princess beauty kit for Madeline, and a stuffed lion for Ward.

You could say the beauty kit was the hit of the weekend. In the kit was a selection on pink and purple hair accessories...and a tube of "lipstick." (A piece of plastic that looks like lipstick.) Madeline spent a lot of time deciding which clip(s) and scrunchies to adorn herself with each morning. And then there was the lipstick. She toted it around in a stuffed unicorn purse all weekend. And I have never seen anything like it. This little girl reapplied every 30 minutes.

"Oh, I just ate. My lipstick came off."
"I got sweaty playing outside. My lipstick came off."
"It's raining. My lipstick came off."

Hilarious.

We had a ton of fun playing outside.

At some point I was the bad witch(?) and the monkey bars lifter-upper. But mostly it was just, "Allison, watch me!"

They are total hams and posed for me at dinner time. I told them to "pretend you're eating." So they did.

But it was really because they didn't like what was for dinner at all, which they made crystal clear soon after.

I mentioned Ward. Remember?

It's kind of easy to forget this kid sometimes. He's so quiet. He just hangs out like this most of the time. Note the very serious expression. This is not just a random expression. This is how he looks all the time. I'm fairly certain he's a genius. He's pretty stinkin' cute, though.

I had fun with Anna and Brandon too, once all the little heads hit the pillows. We watched some serious football on Saturday. I had no idea that my bro-in-law played for Auburn his freshman year. Pretty bad-ass, right?

Day 21

Here's a pretty pattern.

It's my shower curtain. I don't know if I've mentioned it yet, but I am borderline obsessed with World Market.

By the way...

It was this thing.

The Tsaritsa was so close.

Days 18, 19, 20

Slack attack. Sorry, I've been avoiding natural disasters in D.C.

I spy with my little eye...

The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell. This is an awesome book. Awesome. I just finished Freakonomics by Steven D. Levitt & Stephen J. Dubner. Fantastic. Before that? Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins. Wow. I'm on a roll here. I hope my next book doesn't suck.

Here's where the magic happens. And of course by magic I mean surfing the Interwebs while eating Easy Cheese straight from the can.

Day 17 - On the Shelf (Virginia Earthquake 2011)

What a coincidence that today's photo would be "on the shelf." By now you have probably heard about the 5.8-magnitude earthquake that struck the East Coast today. Here's my shelf after the quake.

Nope, no damage. I came home to crooked pictures and opened doors(?), but nothing broken.

Let me say that that earthquake pretty much spoiled the thought of ever moving to California. Or Indonesia. That shit was not cool.